Sunday, October 7, 2007
Pet Peeve of the Week: One Way Please
I always enjoy reading my brother's Wife Advice posts, but I often don't get to implement his advice because I am not married. But I realized one day a few weeks ago, his advice is helpful for humiliating all sorts of offenders, not just wives. I was walking into Walmart with the Donkey and had trouble going through the entrance because the usual bunch of inbred-Walmart shoppers were trying to exit through the entrance. This might be one of the most annoying occurances throughout my day. It happens to me at many different locations, several times a day--people going in and out the wrong way of a building. It truly is a mystery why I should be subjected to such foolishness. Generally in America, we walk through the ride side or on the right side. If the left side is marked 'entrance' no big deal, note the exception and walk through on the left side. So I took advice from my brother and decided to act like I had no room to walk through. I shook the cart violently and pretended to stumble while smashing the cart into various objects. I looked around with a confused look on my face and then looked up toward the entrance sign and let out a head shake. The inbreds were also confused; I'm not sure if it was caused by a missing chromosome or my antics, but I think they got the point. Then after this entrance fiasco, I was confronted by a row of about 8 people walking down the isle in a line (left to right, not single file). I wasn't sure if they were playing red-rover or just confused about simple etiquette. Either way, I decided to participate in their game of chicken and continued in my path on the right side of the isle. When the red-rover team realized I wasn't moving they began to scatter muttering rude comments. I was so confused, why were these people mad at me? These wrong side of the isle walkers need tough love. We can't move out of the way of their stupidity. The only way people that have straw for brains will ever learn their lesson is to have their noses rubbed in their mistake, like a dog who keeps messing on the carpet. So, implement one of theses tactics or devise one of your own when presented with this problem. Does anyone else experience this kind of idiotic phenomenon?